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Three Questions Can Make the Difference Between a Breakthrough and a Setback
Would you rather have a breakthrough or a setback? It’s all in how you’re looking at it. The good news: What’s going wrong is subject to interpretation. The bad news: Most of us default to negative interpretations of difficult and unchosen circumstances. But we don’t have to stick with our first reactions. You have the power to find deeper meaning and value in every situation—even the difficult or painful ones. Your power lies in the questions you ask yourself.
The questions most people start (and stay) with are, “What’s wrong with me?” “Who’s to blame?” and “What’s the worst-case scenario?” These questions don’t move you forward. They don’t give you helpful insights. Instead, they keep you on an endless negative loop of guilt, judgment and worry. They increase your suffering. They keep you stuck and set you back.
If just for a moment, we open ourselves up to new, more expansive responses to our challenges, we make space for breakthroughs. Here are three key questions to ask yourself:
1. What’s another way of looking at this? Your story is just that, a story. Someone else will go through the same thing and have a completely different way of looking at it. Give yourself permission to explore the “everything will be OK” version of the story, even if it’s hard to imagine. Call a trusted friend and have them help you brainstorm other ways to look at what’s happening. Start leaning into the one that feels best.
The questions most people start (and stay) with are, “What’s wrong with me?” “Who’s to blame?” and “What’s the worst-case scenario?” These questions don’t move you forward. They don’t give you helpful insights. Instead, they keep you on an endless negative loop of guilt, judgment and worry. They increase your suffering. They keep you stuck and set you back.
If just for a moment, we open ourselves up to new, more expansive responses to our challenges, we make space for breakthroughs. Here are three key questions to ask yourself:
1. What’s another way of looking at this? Your story is just that, a story. Someone else will go through the same thing and have a completely different way of looking at it. Give yourself permission to explore the “everything will be OK” version of the story, even if it’s hard to imagine. Call a trusted friend and have them help you brainstorm other ways to look at what’s happening. Start leaning into the one that feels best.
2. What inner and outer strengths and abilities am I stretching and strengthening through this experience?
You don’t know how strong and resilient you are until you’ve been tested by life. Your difficulties call on you to find things in yourself you didn’t know were there. You get stretched. You get forced to change, to do new things and to learn. It’s uncomfortable. But, if you allow it, your challenge can result in increased self-confidence and life satisfaction when you’re on the other side of it.
3. What am I’m learning or gaining from this?
Imagine that your life is a classroom, and this situation is one of your lessons. Ask, what is my life trying to teach me with this experience? These insights may come a while after your challenge is in your rearview and you have some perspective. But it’s worth asking because the lessons you take away from challenging life experiences add to your store of wisdom.
By working with these questions, you acknowledge that, although it’s challenging when you’re navigating a painful situation, you get to choose what you take away from it. Don’t worry if answers to these questions don’t come easily at first. Your decision to start asking them is the most important thing.
Helpful Resources:
- Get a free copy of my top-selling book Something Gained: 7 Shifts to Be Stronger, Smarter & Happier After Divorce for tools and insights to recover, heal and thrive! (You just pay for shipping.)
Visit www.DebPurdy.com for more information.
Join the conversation on social media:
Instagram: @lovedebpurdy
Twitter: @lovedebpurdy
Facebook Group: Thrive After Divorce Facebook Group
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MY EX HUSBAND IS BACK TO ME!!!
This is a story of Doctor Odunga who brought my ex husband back to me in 3 days of contact. He told me me he would do it but i didn’t believe him but decided to give him a try and to my greatest surprise, my ex husband came home and started playing with the kids and gave me a kiss on my cheek, knelt down on his knees and begged me for leaving without a goodbye. I heard he had a woman he was seeing before he left me and I was devastated which made me seek help from a spell caster such as Dr. Odunga. I also met this man through a testimony about him and I contacted his email at odungaspelltemple@gmail.com and when I explained things to him, he told me not to worry. I am very happy today that my husband who left me for over 2 years, came back home. I asked him what about the other woman and he said that was his past and nothing will ever make him leave again. I am thankful to Dr. Odunga. Contact him to help you now at odungaspelltemple@gmail.com
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He cast spells for different purposes like(1) If you want your ex back.
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BE SMART AND BECOME RICH IN LESS THAN 3DAYS….It all depends on how fast
you can be to get the new PROGRAMMED blank ATM card that is capable of
hacking into any ATM machine,anywhere in the world. I got to know about
this BLANK ATM CARD when I was searching for job online about a month
ago..It has really changed my life for good and now I can say I’m rich and
I can never be poor again. The least money I get in a day with it is about
$50,000.(fifty thousand USD) Every now and then I keeping pumping money
into my account. Though is illegal,there is no risk of being caught
,because it has been programmed in such a way that it is not traceable,it
also has a technique that makes it impossible for the CCTVs to detect
you..For details on how to get yours today, email the hackers on : (
atmmachinehackers1@gmail.com < Tell your
loved once too, and start to live large. That's the simple testimony of how
my life changed for good…Love you all .
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I’m Angel Castor from the US. White Caucasian Female. I’m 43 years old and I got married at the age of 25, I have only two children and I am living happily.
Five years ago, my husband’s behavior became so strange that I didn’t really understand what was going on. He packed out of the house to another woman’s house and I love him so much that I
never dream of losing him, I tried my best to make sure that my husband got back to me but all to no avail, I cried and cried seeking help. I discussed it with my best friend Alison and she told me she can help me. She told me of a man called Dr. Odunga, she told me he is a very great man and a real man that can be trusted and there is nothing concerning love and Pregnancy issues he cannot solve and she told me how he has helped her and countless number of people in
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Hello everyone my name is Kiara Hahn from California US. I’m here to testify of a great and powerful spell caster called Dr Jakuta. I was so confused and devastated when my fiance left me without a word, I’ve spent the last month crying and feeling guilty. I wasn’t talking to anybody, so one day I search online on love tips because I needed him back desperately and I loved him so much, until I found Dr Jakuta who has solved so many relationship problems then I contacted him and he promised that in less than 72hrs he will come back to me. After I did all he asked, to my greatest surprise my fiance who had refused to speak with me came to my house and asked for forgiveness for all he had made me go through and now we are living happily together, if you have any relationship problem you can contact him Below are his contact details: Email him at doctorjakutaspellcaster24@gmail. com or
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Many people have written articles about how they were helped by a spell caster but I am eternally grateful to this great man who brought my ex-husband back to me. This testimony is a true story and my name is Jennifer Sanchez. When I came in contact with this man was also through a testimony written about him helping with a cure for Herpes Virus and I have also encountered many testimonies about how he has been helping others with their life to win the lottery. To get back with an ex is one of the most innermost feelings many people would love to experience especially as those memories with our ex always cloud our mind when someone else does some of those things our ex used to do. I was a single parent of two boys for almost 6 years and though my ex-husband was not staying with me and the kids I still wish someday he will return to me. This doctor I encountered is known as Dr. Odunga helped me with my wishes and I am happy to write on this website that my ex-husband is back with me. I am very happy to share the testimony with everyone so that they too can meet this great doctor and solve their problems. I don’t know what others might feel about getting their ex back in their life but I always know there is a blessing in disguise with just a single re-connection with an ex. If you want to successfully get back with your ex or facing an infertility problem, contact this great man at odungaspelltemple@gmail.com Or WhatsApp/Call +2348167159012 and share an awesome testimony too just as I did